Need Help Coming Out To Parents?
Every gay person will face the option of coming out to parents at some stage during their lives. This will always be an emotional journey you embark on, so come prepared.
There is no sense in telling your parents you are gay if this only a feeling you are unsure of yourself. In such a case avoid unnecessary stress by rather asking them for help in getting your head around these feelings. They will understand as every person has these feelings at some stage.
But if you are sure of your choice, have an open and frank discussion about it rather sooner than later in your life. This will give you the freedom to be totally yourself at home as you come out. Choose your timing well and rather wait until you can share this information at a time when everybody concerned is in a relaxed mindset.
Many gays make the mistake to tag a friend or even their lovers with them for the coming out talk. This is always a mistake, as your parents will want to talk to you alone and ask personal questions. A familiar reaction from parents is to look for what went wrong and your poor lover may just end up as the escape goat.
Expect a variety of reactions from them. You know them well; so do not think for one moment they do not know you just as well. They might just surprise you and acknowledge that they knew all along.
This is not a time to shy away from the truth as there are bound to be many questions. Some might even include questions about Aids and other gay connected sicknesses. Ensure your folks that you will be careful just like a straight person would be.
Some churches still have major problems with gay people and should you find yourself in such a family you must stick to your convictions. No person, not even your own parents are allowed to judge your faith.
Don’t just talk, listen to them as well as they will want to spell out some rules they may think appropriate. The secret is not to force lovers or guests onto them, rather let the news settle in and wait until they invite another gay person over.
Have lots of compassion and patience for all your family members as they process this information. In a short while they will open up and warm up to you again. Blood is thicker than water.
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